SAY WHAT!
by MerlinHelpMe
Summary: Marriage LAw, Adoption Law, and Severitus all tied into one. This is just a funny little thing that I couldn't get rid of. ONE SHOT. Hope you enjoy.


**SAY WHAT!!!**

Okay this is a mix between several challenges that I have read or heard about.

1 The Marriage Law Challenge

To put simply, there is a law passed that stated that all muggle borns must marry a pure blood (for the sake of the story Snape is not known to be a half blood, so he meets this requirement of being a pureblood.), to raise the number of magical births. Since there are Death Eaters out there that want to get Hermione in their clutches, it is determined that she has to marry Snape.

2 The Adoption Law challenge

This one is about all the orphans because of the war needing a home. Anyone over the age of seventeen must adopt a child each. (Not sure of the complete rules for this, but in this story, each adult must adopt one orphan, married or not) Hermione falls in this category. (Remember she is almost a year older than everyone).

3 Severitus challenge.

Here we find out that in some way shape or form Snape is Harry's real father.

Now this story will be set after Voldermort has been defeated. This is the trio's last year at Hogwarts. I only plan to make this be a one-shot. Enjoy.

**SAY WHAT!!!**

Chapter 1

Hermione Granger was excited to be back at Hogwarts. The final battle between Harry and Voldermort happened at the end of her sixth year. That summer her and her parents traveled the world, since it was now safe from Voldermort (and she could use her magic if any of the still free Death Eaters caught up with her). She had turned 17 the previous September and her parents were excited to be able to see what their daughter could do with her magic. Now she was back in her world. Harry and Ron sat on either side of her at the Gryffindor table for the sorting feast. She couldn't be happier starting her last year at Hogwarts. It would be the best!

Harry had changed a lot over the summer. Where as before the final battle, he was scrawny (but a tr5ained warrior), now he was well built. You could tell that he had been working out in the last year. He was at least 6'4, when last year he was only 5'4. His hair had changed form uncontrollable brown to long, straight, and black. About the only thing that hadn't changed were his eyes. They were still that wonderful shade of green. Only now they held much more power and wisdom than any 17 year only should know. His summer at the Dursley's had been hell. Dumbledore had wanted him to go there for one last summer, to get away from all his adoring fans after the final battle. He thought that this year it might have been easier. No, the second he was shoved inside the house, he was squeezed into the cupboard. His body just didn't fit in there anymore. It seemed that as soon as Voldermort was killed that he instantly grew and changed. He no longer looked like James Potter, but someone familiar. His 'family' had decided that he would stay locked in the cupboard all summer. They let him out once a day to eat some bread and cheese with a cup of water and to use the toilet. How he managed to survive, he had no idea. Now here he was back at Hogwarts and he will never have to return to the Dursley's again. He couldn't be happier starting his last year at Hogwarts. It would be the best!

Ron Wesley was beside himself with joy. Ever since the final battle, no one looked at him as 'Harry Potter's best friend' any longer. He had helped protect Harry in the final battle. He had jumped in front of a slicing hex that was aimed at Harry, so that Harry could kill Voldermort. Unfortunately he lost a leg, but it was worth it. Since it took more than an hour for medical help to get to them, they medi wizards were unable to re-grow it. Now he was sporting a modern version of Moody's leg. Everyone thought of him as a hero. He had his own spotlight now. All he had to do was convince Hermione that they were perfect to0gether and that they should get married. And that was his one and only mission this year. He couldn't be happier starting his last year at Hogwarts. It would be the best!

Now Severus Snape was sitting on the edge of his seat. Voldermort was dead and gone forever. He no longer had to spy. Everyone finally believed that he wasn't a true Death Eater, for he had protected Dumbledore in the final battle. Voldermort had thrown the Killing Curse at Dumbledore in the final battle and Severus realized what was going to happen before the curse was uttered. He was standing next to Dumbledore and he waited until the words were spoken then he threw himself into Dumbledore knocking them both to the ground, with the deadly jet of green light speeding past them and landing on an unsuspecting Bellitrex Lestrange. Now he was sitting at the damn sorting feast for the 'Golden Trio's' final year at Hogwarts. He was going to be able to shock the entire school when he stopped acting the way he had in the last twenty some odd years. He was going to be nice (for the most part) and fair. He couldn't be happier with a new start to the year at Hogwarts. It would be the best!

OH HOW WRONG THEY ALL WERE!!!

Chapter 2

The feast was over and the students and teachers alike were all getting ready to head to their respective rooms, when the Great Hall doors burst open and in walked Fudge. The stupid Minister of Magic was grinning like a Cheshire cat, carrying a rolled up piece of parchment. He walked straight to the Head Table, cast the sonorous charm and turned to the room full of bewildered students.

"If everyone could sit down, I have an announcement to make. Yes, you too headmaster. There is nothing that can be done to stop what I am about to say. Now, let me let all of you know that our world will cease to exist if certain actions are not taken. That is why the ministry has made a new law. It states that for the magical growth of our world that all muggle born witches and wizards must marry a pureblood. Now originally we were going to let the purebloods petition for the muggle borns, but we decided that it would be better if we matched couples based on their grades and interest. Now I am please to inform you that our very first couple is here tonight. Miss Hermione Granger and Professor Severus Snape. Please come up here." Fudge waited until both of the two called came forward. He didn't even bother to take in the behavior (and neither will the author).

"Now sign here one these lines and your magical binding will be complete." Hermione and Snape looked at each other then at the waiting Fudge, then at the Headmaster who just shrugged. They looked back at each other and shrugged, took the quill from Fudge and signed the parchment. They were now Husband and wife. The two didn't wait to be dismissed, the just grasped hands and left the Great Hall.

Everyone was in shock. How could the ministry do this? Hermione and Snape? And what was this about the magical world ceasing to exist? However while they were thinking this, Hermione and Snape were running through the corridors of Hogwarts to get to the dungeons. Their plan had worked. They had fallen in love the previous summer as they were put to work for the order. Of course since she was a student and just barley legal, they decided that they could not take any action other than talking and keeping each other company ( at a safe distance) Through the year Hermione did research to see about the rise in squib and still births in the pureblood lines. She came to a startling result. They were killing out their own lines. Her and Snape talked about this and decided that it would help them. They went and talked to the minister (in disguise of course). They made their proposal and a few stipulations. The law could not be passed until after Voldermort had been defeated, they would be paired together not matter what, and they could not be identified as the ones to created the law or that they had paired themselves together. Once an oath had been made, they reviled themselves. The minister was speechless. Once he was assured that there was no coercion on Snape's part and that they had not already partaken in the pleasure of their love, he put the plan into motion. (Actually it went behind his desk in a secret drawer that only his wand and uncompromised magical signature would open, to wait until Voldermort had been defeated.) Now they were on their way to their wedding bed.

Chapter 3

Unbeknownst to the Snape's, not only had their law passed, but another was passed as well. All witches and wizards over 18 had to adopt an orphan of the war. Married couples had to adopt at least 2 children. As soon as the Snape's made it out of their rooms, (which was well after lunch) they discovered this new twist on their marriage. Severus saw the Daily Prophet and heard the rumors.

"Ah, hell. We don't even get a honeymoon before we get kids. How totally not fair." Hermione laughed and swatted his arm.

"Oh hush you. Now how many of your Slytherins are orphans?" Hermione asked innocently.

"What? No. Hermione dear we cannot adopt all of the Slytherin orphans." Severus stated dumbfounded. She smiled sweetly at him.

"Would you rather we adopt two infants? Or twenty children who will be of age in three to seven years? We wouldn't need to worry about the finical aspect my parents have plenty of money, which in turns means that I have plenty of money. Yes even for twenty children. Not a whole lot would change here within Slytherin. All of the children of Death Eaters are no longer here. That only leaves a handful of children in Slytherin. There are none in 5th, 6th, or 7th year and only five students for the first four years. It really is a shame that Voldermort tried to kill all the purebloods that refused him. Now I know that 20 kids is a lot, but we could set up the dorm like our own home. Put a door to our private chambers in the common room. It could work. Nobody is going to understand these kids better than you do already. They already know and trust you and most of them feel the same for me. Now no more arguing we have twenty kids to go adopt." Hermione finished her rant while her new husband stood in shock. OH MERLIN! He was going to adopt 20 kids. He knew better than to argue with Hermione, he would never win. Shoot anybody who knew her knew that.

Severus followed Hermione to the headmasters office, watched in amusement as she didn't even greet the bemused headmaster, but went straight to the fireplace gave himself a stern look indicating that they would travel together and stepped into the now green flames. The last thing he saw was a laughing Headmaster. When they landed out of the floo. Hermione stepped gracefully out and lead the way to the new department for orphans. They lines were outrageous, so she turned around and went to the ministers office. Again she didn't even knock, just walked right in. Behind his desk Fudge was sputtering with rage. Before he could get a word in edge wise Hermione started in on him.

"Oh do put a cork in it minister. We are here to adopt our children in regards to the new law passed. Yes, yes I know there's a new department for that and we should be there, however we have a rather large amount of children that we plan on adopting, so we figured we would come straight to you. You see, Severus and I have decided to adopt all of the orphaned Slythernin's." Severus snorted and mumbled to himself.

"More like she told me. I decided nothing. I didn't have a choice." Hermione glared at him.

"Oh really, would me like to make the choice as to where you will be sleeping tonight or will you plug it up?" Severus quickly shut his mouth while the minister snickered.

"Now minister, if you we be as kind as to draw up the paper work for these adoptions." After witnessing the way the Hermione dealt with Severus, he didn't even argue. He got together all the paper work, filled it out signed and witnessed their signatures and watched each h parchment rolled up and disappear when it became official. Hermione smile sweetly.

"Thank you minister. Come on 'Dad' we have some new children to introduce to the school." Severus just nodded and followed her out of the office like a good little puppy… I mean husband.

Needless to say the school was shocked that not only had Hermione taken on the name of Snape as the Professors husband, but that she had managed to get him to adopt all twenty of the Slytherin's that were left at the school, and she seemed happy about it all.

Chapter 4

The next morning while Hermione was moving some of Severus' things around to make room for a picture of each one of her new kids, she found a photo album. She opened it and went through the pictures with a mounting joy.

"Severus" she called. He came in the room from his potions lab, saw what she had and tried to make a hasty retreat.

"You had better not run away from me. What is this? This is Lily Potter. Why is she wearing a wedding dress and staring into your eyes with love? And why are you smiling down at her while she is holding a new baby boy?" Severus sighed.

Lily was not a Potter. Not really anyways. Lily and I had been in love, we got married had a baby, then I became a spy. Since the marriage and baby were only know to a few close friends, my cousin James Potter decided to pretend that he married her and the baby was his. We put a spell on the baby so that is would never break until Voldermort was gone for good and I left to go to my spying duties. If you would have given me a chance to explain yesterday I would have told you then. Now we have 21 kids, and your best friend is your stepson. Congratulations 'Mom'." With that Severus went back into his lab. Hermione let out a shriek of joy and went t to find Harry.

Harry was happy to find out that he had a father and understood why Snape couldn't have claimed him sooner. He not only had a father, but he had a new mum too. And 20 brothers and sisters.

Ron was not too happy with all of this. HE decided that he just couldn't take Hogwarts anymore with both of his best mated being Snape's and he left school to join his brothers at their joke shop.

AND THE SNAPE FAMILY ALL LIVED HAPPILY EVER AFTER


End file.
